Hey everybody since that last time I wrote a post sooo many things have taken place but the one subject that resonates in my mind is relationships. More so relationships of the intimate kind such as boyfriend girlfriend, husband wife, baby momma baby daddy etc. But also there is also the relationships with family.
This week has surely been a testing time with one particular relationship in my family...my sister. I have went over the details in my head of what took place a couple of days ago a million times so I really don't feel like going into detail at this point today. But I will say my sister and me both lost our mother when I was four and she was a little over one. We were raised by my grandmother and my aunt and I must say our childhood was pretty good my grandmother and aunt were truly a blessing, matter of fact my entire family because they all played a share. So you would think the adversities we faced would have brought us ever closer since really if we were to take out the family aspect we are all we got from our mother. But for some reason that just is not the case. Now I know siblings fight and argue and have disagreements but they way our relationship is heading seems to be going beyond just disagreements. I rack my brain all the time about how I can fix the situation and what I can do differently but honestly I'm sure there are other factors in my sisters life that contribute to the turmoil in our relationship. One main factor is some of the entities my sister has let into her life, she doesn't exactly pick the best friends or mates in my opinion but of course that is not my decision and don't get me started on decisions. I feel my sister makes some of the most crazy decisions and two years ago she had my wonderful niece who I absolutely adore, so I feel her decisions could be a lot better if she was keeping my niece in mind. At this point that is the biggest clash my frustrations with her decisions and how it affects my niece and the standpoint I'm coming from is love, love for my sister and niece and wanting the best for them. Often I have thoughts in my head of us getting along and being so supportive and happy but I guess that vision is on hold until many of these issues we have are worked out. I have come to the realization though that as much as I try to practice humility and let bygones be bygones with my sister, for our relationship to work it has to be a two way street and hopefully one day she will want to maintain her portion of that street so that there can be a free flow of love.
Now to the topic at hand intimate relationships. In my experiences I have seen soooo many types of relationships and I don't know maybe its just me and I'm weird or I'm just thinking too analytically but just like 1 + 1 equals 2 if you see bull then you should be through. I am VERY much for committed relationships and MARRIAGE, in my family there are a number of 20 plus year marriages, so you can understand why I have absolutely no tolerance for people who wont commit and cheat but also no tolerance for those who are selfish and prey upon people in relationships. A relationship is very much about giving and sacrifice but if that person you are with does not have your best interests at heart its time to move on. NO it is not NOT easy but that's why were given a heart and a BRAIN. Emotion was built into humans to help them be able to show love and compassion were don't just work off of instinct like animals, but at the same time emotions could lead you astray so its up to you to use your brain then to think logically and rework your situation to preserve your self. I have not had many relationships because when I love I love HARD, and why shouldn't I? I should feel comfortable enough with the person i'm with to be vulnerable and let them see my weaknesses and not feel they will try to play upon those weaknesses to get over on me. So since I love so hard I know that if I get hurt it will be even more hard for me to get over it. So I figure why waste my time with people are not even close to that material when I can really save my love for someone who deserves it. Yes I may at times be a bit lonely but I would rather be at peace by myself than be stressed and have someone on my arm. When I talk like this I'm mainly thinking about the women in my life who I care so much about who have gone through all kinds a foolishness with men they are with. Here are a couple of truths women should be following:
1. If that fool tries or actually hits you once ...HE WILL DO IT AGAIN
2. If he cheats once shame on him if he cheats twice shame on you for not kicking him to the curb.
3. DO NOT I repeat DO NOT get pregnant from him to keep him like a friend said today you just opening yourself up to 18 years of heartache.
4. If you have been with him for some time, have had a baby from him and he still ain't ready to commit nine times outta ten he does not feel you are the one and you should move on to preserve your sanity and save what good qualities he hasn't ruined for the next dude that will love and cherish you.
5. If the man cheats stop going after and obsessing over the female he did it with. It takes TWO to cheat yea she is sorry especially if she knew he had a girl but he is twice as sorry for getting with her and not caring about what it would do to you.
6. Be OK with being by your self you just may like it and learn something about your self you may not have known because a bad relationship was overshadowing it.
Trust there is more but I don't have all night. The bottom line is you don't have to settle for less just to say you are in a relationship make people prove themselves and work to get the best of you because at the end of the day you will find most people you will encounter are not worth it.
I am sooo vibin to the Fantasia track The Worst Part is Over it really speaks to the heart about getting past difficult situations and looking forward to a brighter day.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bqrtELehpX0
Citiboi
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